If you have visited Goa in the 80s and early 90s, you will know what I am talking about. Yes, its definitely better in Goa but what I am talking about are the white T-shirts sold on the beach, with an orange sun and coconut palms in the background and proudly announcing “Its better in Goa”. So what, if the T-shirts shurnk after one wash. What was important is that while you were in Goa you couldn't leave without buying one. It was a way of acknowledging the great time spent in Goa. I bet it could give the 'I Heart New York' T-shirt run for its money.

I am not writing an article on my recent visit to Goa. Yes, I did visit Goa and yes, it's my home. So, I did have a great time during my last trip back home. And let me sound a bit cliché and say that it was too short. Indeed, it was. I can give that as an excuse to myself for not blogging. But heck, its been almost 3 months since. So, I just accept the fact that I am lazy. And I aint someone whose blog people wait to read anyways.

Anyway, coming back to Goa. What made me write this article is a comment one of my friends made when I was reciting the tales of my exploits in Goa. That made me feel that somehow people have a very wrong idea about Goa. So, the rest of the blog is dedicated to correcting certain misconceptions about Goa.

1.Goa is so small. It should be a part of Maharashtra. Heck, they dont do anything there other than booze and get laid. At least they will learn do something useful.

My reply: Yes, be a part of Maharashtra and turn into one of those Godforsaken places on the Maharashtra- border with no electricity and water supply. You will know what I am saying if you visit any of the towns/villages on the Maharashtra side of the Goa-Maharashtra border. Thank God, the people of Goa had the good sense to vote against merger during the plebiscite held immediately after liberation. Btw, that makes me sidestep again. When we talk about India liberating Goa and India caring for Goa, why was it left to be under the Portuguese rule for 15 friggin years after 1947? I am not an India basher and I might not know my history well. But, there better be a good explanation for starting the Operation Vijay 15 years late.

As for getting laid, trust me (okay I agree I am no hunk but I have friends who are), it's as difficult to get laid in Goa as it is anywhere else in India. Unless of course you pay for it. But then, if thats the criteria, comparing Goa to Bombay (yes I use that word...anyone taking objections, piss off) , would be like comparing the box office collections of Mithun starrer Gunda to Titanic. The girls from Goa (and by that I mean the locals...okay let me be specific, I am referring to the 99% girls who do not work in flesh trade) are as bitchy and unavailable as the rest of them all over India. No offence girls, you know we all love you.

I guess that leaves booze. Well, gotto hand it to you here. But then, how much have you roamed in Goa. A North-South Goa tour lasting two days taking you to the tourist spots, is it? So you must be talking about people boozing on the beach. Hell yes, you are. Then you must be one of those who go to Panama City and expect to see choir groups singing hymns. I am glad the Goa Government hasn't imposed whatever that additional tax is on liquor. That helped to get through the Engineering days pretty smoothly. Yes, there are Engineering Colleges in Goa. Oh, surprised, then here's another one. There are four of them. More surprised? One of them is a BITS (thats right). And while I am sweeping the carpet under you, the first medical college in Asia was in Goa (GMC). On a serious note, (I know I will sound as if I am patronizing but) you will find a very few Goans falling in the proverbial gutter after drinking. Most of the people who over-indulge in the pleasures are the ones who come in for a day or two of fun in Goa. Nothing wrong in it. Maybe because since the liquor is always cheap, Goans think why spend all the money today? Let us keep some for later. Its something to do with the way media has always projected Goa. In every movie, when they introduce a Goan (who is invariably called D'Costa or D'Mello), he will have a liquor flask along. And yes, they make them talk in a funny accented hindi. Wonder which part of Goa they come from. Anyway, its a tourist spot so I guess it bodes well to portray it as a party place. And I am glad it is. But we do have a life in Goa (how boring) besides drinking and getting laid.

2.The biggest festival in Goa is Carnival

My reply: Stereotypes, stereotypes, stereotypes. Thats what media does to us. Just like when I came to US I had this idea about buildings (read New York) everywhere. Whats my fault? Karan Johar never showed me Kutzu trees on highways. I think I digress too much. Focus Barmy, focus. I am sorry to break your dream but its good old Chaturthi. In fact, all schools in Goa close for a week during chaturthi. Imagine my surprise when I lived in Bombay (while in primary school, father worked in a bank so we had to) and they gave us a holiday for just two days. But then, how would I light crackers for 5 days if I am in school. Btw, the previous line isnt a mistake. Goans are a crazy bunch of people. We light more crackers during Chaturti than Diwali. And believe me, we light up a lot of those. The government has better things to do than tackling the noise pollution during the festive season. Yes there is carnival which puts Goa on the tourist map. So, its much more commercially viable to project Carnival. Imagine GTDC spending crores on projecting chaturti as the most celebrated festival in Goa. But then wait a minute. How can that be possible? Goa is full of Christians/Catholics. So, how can chaturti be the main festival in Goa. Surprise, surprise. Check out the stats dude/dudette. Hindus constitute more than 65% of Goa's population, Catholics/Christians – 30% and the other religions make up the remaining 5%. I am not a big believer in religion or God but I do find it funny when people are surprised that I am a hindu in Goa. As if , they are talking to Danesh Kaneria from the Pak cricket team.

I started writing this blog not to make it a Goa V/s rest of India issue. I am proud of the culture we have in Goa. Believe me, we consider ourselves as much Indian as anyone else in India. And I am proud to be an Indian. But when someone tries to take the pride of being a Goan away, it hurts.